On my period and sick. This is fucking fabulous.



Better not be swine flu.

I honestly cannot believe the shit that happens to me. A big smack in the face from God. Fuck.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

I haven't written on this thing in agesss, and it's about time to change that.

So here's a little update on my life:
I'm back in Boston, sitting in my single(!!!) dorm room, and I'm actually pretty happy. I love my friends here and they're the kind of people that can always pick you up when you're down. Coming back was pretty tough on me. I lived with Cody this summer, and all I can say is that I witnessed our love grow EXPONENTIALLY. It was the best time of my life. Honestly. We're at that point where I look into his eyes and I can just feel the love radiating out of him. I just know. He's the one. He's my everything.

School is pretty cool so far, I guess. I started studio yesterday, and so far, it's pretty much the same as last year. But it won't last too long. Things can't be that easy ha. I'm taking dance, music, theory, acting, spanish, lit, blah blah blah, and so on. My classes seem pretty challenging so I hope I do well this semester. Scratch that, I know I will :)

We have the first auditions coming next week. You're A Good Man, Charlie Brown. Then we have auditions for a few more shows. I'm excited. It's my junior year, and I think things are gonna look up for me. I'm gonna get a role if I have to snag it. There's nothing wrong with playing dirtayyy once in a while :P

Anyways, things are good. I'm going to see the 9 tonight with my friends, and I'm so excited. This is going to be a better year than I thought.

I moved back in with Cody.
Everything's perfect.
Except, you know, being sick.


But I can deal.
Blue skiiies, hot fuckin' weather.
Everything is still completely beautiful.

I come home tomorrow.



whoooooaaaa.
:D

It's been one month since Emilio passed away, and I still can't believe he's really gone.



Wow.
Miss you, E-Mils.
Rest in peace.

mentally checked out and there's still three weeks of school.
uh oh.



summer, hurry up, please.

I DIDN'T GET CUT!!!!!


In two years, I will be graduating from Emerson College with a B.F.A. in Musical Theatre.
I might very well be on Broadway someday. I'll wave.

I miss you.



Rest in peace, Emilio.

and I haven't even finished my first one yet.


HOME IN T-3 DAYS.
Disneylanddd :D :D :D
the beach!
hanging out with my boy
cuddling
kissing
naps
a whooole lotta love

I hate random lonely nights.

Today is mine and Cody's two year anniversary.
Wow.

Honestly, I could not be any happier. It seems like the time has flown by, but at the same time, I feel like I know him so well that it seems like we've been dating forever. I never thought I could meet someone who would make me so happy. He really is my very best friend. I think it's so strange because I've been in love before, but I have never experienced something like this. It's just so real. And it's so nice to know that I'm with someone who loves me just as much as I love him. Someone who will hold me when I'm cold, and will reach for my hand, or in for a kiss, without me ever having to ask. It's so unconditional. He just gets me and I get him. Every time we say goodbye, my heart aches, and I just want to turn around and go back. At the same time, I think it's strange to be so completely happy with Cody, even in the time we spend apart. I don't think it's possible that I could be happier with someone else, even if I spent every single day with them.

My heart is so full of love. Everyday is an adventure. I am just so blessed.

... when I miss Cody the most.


I thought that now that all the problems with my voice are behind me, that things would get better... I guess not. I was one of the only girls in the sophomore musical theatre class that didn't get a callback for the spring musical. I got less than enthusiastic jury responses, and I haven't been in a show at Emerson all year. It's kind of hard not to break down a little bit under these circumstances. I'm losing my confidence. I hate that. I have re-auditions coming up in March, and with everything that's been going on, it's hard to stay positive and do my best to fight my way into the BFA program.

I'll do it, though. I have to.
Please just throw me a rope... any help at all to boost my confidence.


I need a Cody hug.

this Thanksgiving break was just beautiful.


I love you.
I LOVE YOU.
I love you so much.

This saying goodbye thing never gets any easier.
But I'm seeing you in about two weeks, so that cheers me up.

I still get a sick feeling in my stomach whenever I think about you or see a photo of you.



I wonder if one day that will change, and I'll actually look back and be happy about the time I spent with you.

siiiiick

I'm obsessed with Twilight...



And Edward Cullen.
I'm not ashamed to admit it!

people are so ignorant.


yes, you have a right​ to an opini​on and to share​ that opini​on,​ but there​ is no reaso​n to belit​tle someo​ne and say that even thoug​h prop 8 passe​d,​ " boo hoo, they can still​ put it in each other​'​s butts​"​.​ good thing​ you delet​ed that bulle​tin right​ after​ you poste​d it, becau​se you'​re fucki​ng ignor​ant.​

for those​ who voted​ yes on 8, or no on 8, I respe​ct your opini​on.​ but don'​t use your opini​on to try to put someo​ne else down.​